Are the police looking for you? Involved in a scam? Afraid of getting exposed? Reporters on your nerves?

Look no further! Now you have BailKart, your all-in-one bail buddy. No need to wait for that friend to bail you out anymore, now you have a defense lawyer in your pocket!

Why go through the hassle of filling up a form and posting it, or even hiring a lawyer? Just fill up our profile, add your bank account and there you go! No more worries about being arrested.

Instant Freedom is now a reality.

Get 50% cash back on your second arrest. Just enter code SALLU50 @ checkout

Any case over 100cr get 42.0% off on processing fee. Just enter code AMMA420 @ checkout

Keep your eyes peeled and wallets open for our lightning bail deals, by you for you

Features:

  1. Online banking to pay your bail amount.
  2. Select same day delivery, one day delivery or two day delivery to suit your needs at marginally extra cost.
  3. For extremely urgent cases, we offer our premium service “InstaBail”, where you get it within 30 minutes or its on us.
  4. Select your bail from a host of options depending on your crime and social status.
  5. Subscription mode for perpetual bail.
  6. Automatic bail extension: now you don’t have to keep track of your bail payments as we do it for you with our new “Under-the-table” technology.

Changelog:

v1.3

  1. Now select EMI option for payment and pay when you can.
  2. Material design elements.
  3. Added option to deliver copy of bail to nearest police station.
  4. Twitter and Facebook trend generators added, assuring extremely sympathetic statements for little extra cost.

v1.2

  1. Bribe-on-delivery option added
  2. Now refer friends and earn reward points: .

v1.1

  1. Assorted bug fixes including one very serious bug where you got the bail after the police arrived.

Our Testimonials

Eternally Popular Ex-CM Balu Yadav:

I wish we had something like this in my time. Would have given me a good two years to ruin my state further. Thanks to BailKart I never had to relive those horrific days again.

Blockbuster Actor Balwan “Bhai” Khan:

BailKart is awesome. Jail? Ain’t nobody got time for that. If it wouldn’t have been for BailKart, it wouldn’t be only my personal loss. The country would have to bear the horror of not having any of my movies for the next 5 years!

CM and leader of ABCDMK “Amma” Bhayalalitha:

I got to know about Bailkart from our esteemed onsite PM Moody ji who referred it to me via Balwan Bhai. But unfortunately it was in BETA at that time and was not working for scams yet. I ensured they got PRIME office space in CHENNAI to sort it out quickly and I got out. Now it’s a mandatory app for all my party members.

Mahakhalnayak Munnabhai a.k.a Baba:

I am glad I could be the source of inspiration behind such a novel effort. We all know how famous people have it hard in India. It was high time someone came up with this. My monthly excursions are a breeze now.

Our latest Clientele, Asatyam Scam’s Ravanlinga Raju andBesahara Pariwar‘s head of the family Scambrato Roy were not available for detailed feedback but they send their regards and have shown interest in further investments in our initiative

Also by us:
BribeKart : To bribe or not to bribe, that is no longer the question
Bailkart Elite: For those, who just can’t ‘settle’


Disclaimer : This is a news and political satire , which may or may not use real names, often in semi-real or mostly fictitious ways. Any resemblance to the truth is purely coincidental, except for all references to politicians and/or celebrities, in which case they are based on real people, but still based almost entirely in fiction.

P.S: This was originally posted by me on reddit, and I received some awesome feedback and comments on this one. I have taken the liberty to include those ideas in the post. Anyone having any objection to that can kindly express the same in the comment section below. We’ll notify our developers 😛

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