It sounds rough, Doesn’t it? For some of you, it might even mean that I don’t care about my significant other or I am not possessive. Some of you might also conclude it’s just a reasoning to do whatever I want or I am ungrateful to her.
But that’s not what relationship is for me. For me, a relationship involves two differently unique people who have managed to find a common interest. For me, a relationship is about two people continuous growing with each other’s help. For me, a relationship is about doing amazing things together despite being able to maintain their uniqueness.
And sadly, this is something we rarely see. The relationship these days have become a thing where both of the partners try too hard impressing each other and failing eventually. Too often, We hear the excuse, “He/She was not meant for me. I just didn’t feel happiness around them and it sucked all the energy out of me.”
How can you ever find happiness in an act where you continuously feel the need of impressing others? How can we ever find happiness by being something we never are?
How can you ever find happiness at a place where you need to make someone else happy before yourself?
Blame it on social pressure, or on rom-com where the characters quit their jobs and run to the airport at the very last minute. Blame it on the countless Bollywood movies where each of the partners makes a dose of extra effort just to make their significant other happy?
The society and this movie have taught us to always prioritize our partners before we prioritize ourselves. Apparently, that’s what is called selfless love.
I personally can never buy the logic, though. For me, both of their needs are important and both of them need to work on that. We can be important to each other without being the most important. Instead, I’d like to be a team that supports each other in their individual pursuits without resentment.
I don’t want to be the most important person in your life and I am not your everything because of most likely, you are not my everything either. It might sound narcissistic for sure, but it carves a deeper fact. We are two different individuals trying to understand life in our own ways. We have our own aspirations and dreams which we wish to pursue. For me, I can still be someone’s true love and let my own life and aspirations hold more weight.
I can love the person effortlessly and I still can want to be my ideal self. I don’t want to lose my identity in handling this relationship and I don’t want you to do it either.
I want you to understand that you are not my everything. But I still want to be with you. And this is what I expect from you as well. I want you to be self-dependent in this relationship. I want you to be unique in this relationship and I want us to constantly grow together.
I want you to understand that the path of life is unknown to all. There can some constraints, by law of nature, that might hamper our relationship but I want you to be strong because you are the person you need. You have to be self-dependent more than depending on me or in fact anything in this world.
I want us to grow, prosper and always stay happy with whatever we are, and that can only come with us being our true self. I want us to enjoy the most of this relationship but preserving our true identity as well. I want us to make the most out of this relationship without being dependent on each other at all.