The more I think about it, the more my idea of a “perfect love” evolves. And apparently, there is nothing like it. The concept of “perfection” and “love” and never be used together since both of these are subjective. In the last few years, I have had numerous false assumptions about love, and as I have matured, my idea of what love should actually be keeps changing.
For me, the rules of love cannot and should not be dictated. A relationship involves two different people and it would be foolish to assume that their definition of love would be the same. Assuming a heterosexual relationship involving a man and a woman, the definition of love varies even more because of the way we have evolved. Men have completely different needs compared to a woman and there lies the biggest conflict.
We often expect our partners to love us in the same way we do, and that is the biggest mistake we commit.
Different personality demands different needs and different expectations. No matter how hard a person tries, He/She can never stand up to your expectations. And It would be a foolish act to even expect something like it. True love lies in accepting your partner in their purest form without expecting them to act in your way.
Love is not only about compatibility or physical attraction either. It’s an amalgamation of various other components which are equally as important. Like I said before, there is no particular definition of perfect love. But I would try to decode what perfect love sounds in my head. For me,
Love is about finding a balance between independence and clinginess!
There is no second thought on how an excess of anything can be a bad. The same applies to a relationship. It has often been argued that being independent is an integral part of any great relationship. And some argue that in a relationship, interdependence is needed to keep things alive. How about we find a midway? Too much of independency kills the relationship because there is no attachment involved. Both would then try to find out a way benefitting them and the relationship would eventually crash.
And Being too much involved is scary too. One doesn’t get the liberty to do what they want because of restrictions which might look good in a small duration but haunts in a longer run.
Finding a balance between the two could be the way out for a perfect relationship.
Love is more about giving than taking!
I have previously talked about how expectations hold the power to destroy your relationships, job or self-esteem. And talking about relationships, in particular, It’s way too hard not to have any expectations. And asking you to do that would only sound good on paper.
So here’s the deal.
Give as much as you can but do not expect the same thing back.
Whenever there are two people involved, there would be differences and a relationship is all about finding the commons between these differences. Expecting your other half to do the same thing as you do would be illogical because they can’t think like you. Their way of loving you would be different from how you love them.
Keep showering love in your own way without asking them to do the same. Understanding plays a key role in creating a beautiful relationship.