Ain’t Instagram the coolest thing? With one click of a button, you can share your pictures all around the world seeking likes from strangers you have never ever met. How awesome is that? For begeninners, Instagram is that feeling you can get only when you are in it, so basically it’s just like sex. You would be excited to be a part of that, but once you are done, there is actually nothing. Here are things you would know only when you are an Instagrammer:
1. Expensive meal has no other use than getting clicked!
You go to a posh restaurant and order the most fancy dish from the menu which you can’t even spell. You keenly wait for the order to come and the waiter to lay it off on the table. And there you go! Waaaait. What are you trying to do? You can’t touch the food unless I take at least 10 different photographs of the meal each at different angles. And believe me, the one from the top just nails it. If you are a rookie, make sure you lay the food and drinks in the most random fashion and then fill the voids with fancy materials like flowers lying on the table. Take a click from the top and you are done for the night.
2. No Sunset is complete without you doing an Yoga posture in front!
You are looking at the beautiful red evening with the Sun preparing to dusk to the night. The nature is boasting its beauty at its best annnnnnnnnd the time has come. Get ready with the camera, I will give you a quick yoga posture. To nail this act, make sure that you are sitting either showing your front or your sides with the Sun retiring behind you.
3. Traveling to a new city actually means random shots of street food!
What’s the most exciting part about traveling to a new city? Is it the excitement of seeing something new? Is it different food? or Is it sex with strangers( Oh! Sorry. You don’t get any)? It’s none of the following. The best part about traveling to a new city is clicking photographs and posting it on Instagram showing how awesome your life is. If you wish to nail this act, make sure you click pictures of random street food, fruits, vegetables or basically whatever you can see.
4. Judge a book only by its cover!
The phrase “You should not judge a book by its cover” is now old and rusty. It’s not even applicable now. If you are an Instagrammer, you know how important the book cover is for us. Books and Magazines can be amazing props, no matter what is their content. Just click those from different angles and sides. Make sure you set the camera close and far no matter wherever you are.
5. Auto focus is God!
Gone are the days when you had to manually change settings in a camera to get a good exposure and focus. With the advent of Auto focus, anyone can become a good photographer or Instagrammer. Just lay the camera close to whatever you are clicking, and let it do everything for you. The rest is taken care by the Instagram filters and you are ready to go. See, this is not rocket science.
6. Your girl friend is only worthy until she can do modeling!
What’s the use of a girl friend if you cannot click her modeling style and poses and post it on Instagram? If you don’t have that, what are you even doing with her life? If you don’t have a girl friend who can model, dump her already!