I was sitting alone in my favorite cafe last evening and suddenly a thought struck me,
What the fuck am I doing with my life?
I am nowhere close to my dream, in fact, my destination is getting blurry amidst the noises and the crowd. It was a mild panic attack where I could only think about why I am not rich or famous yet, what am I really doing with my life and am I giving 100% into doing what I love?
And to be frank, this isn’t the first time, thoughts like these sprouted in my head. At times like these, I can’t help but look at people sitting around me, happy and successful, driving their amazing cars and most importantly being able to order whatever they want to eat.
To deviate myself from these, I logged into my Instagram account only to left more miserable. No matter how well I am doing, it feels like my life has come to a halt, with me wasting so much of precious time, my life doesn’t look fun anymore. It’s dull, it’s boring, it’s poor. At this stage, everything that others do suddenly start looking cool and makes me wonder why am I not doing the same thing as them?
At this point, I was only left with two choices, cry about how average my life is or to be proud of myself and follow my dreams. Of course, I did what every sane person would do. I got up, went back home and slept like a baby. Forget about problems, forget about doubts and forget about what others are doing. It was time to focus. But how would I do that? How would I answer the questions that keep running in my head?
I started to do Why-Why Analysis in my life which I have preached a lot and also talked about in my book, “How to unleash your true potential” which I will share with you.
Has it ever happened to you as well?
If you too have experienced a few whiplashes like this in your life, I am sure you and I are the same and we would understand each other very well. You too would know how would it feel like to be behind everyone in the race. But like I said before, there are a few conclusions I derived after peaking way too deep into my life. Here are some of those summaries:
- If you ever feel guilty about wasting your time, ask yourself a very basic question, “Why am I wasting time?” Be honest with yourself and try to get into the deep cause of what the issue is. Maybe you don’t have the perfect atmosphere to do it? Maybe you are not too motivated? Find the reason behind it and try to find out what can be changed? If there is nothing you can do to change it, ask yourself how badly you want to make your dream come true? If you would be serious about it, you would find out a way to do it. Priorities always matter. It all comes down to how badly you want it.
- If you feel jealous of other people doing amazing things in life, the best way is to appreciate what they are doing and feel good for them. Who am I kidding though? It never works in real life. It’s hard to beat down all of our evolutionary traits in one go. The best way to tackle this is again with logic.`When we get jealous of people, we often cherry pick the good things about them and conveniently choose to ignore the parts which we don’t like. So, the next time, you feel jealous of anyone, think about their entire life rather than the good parts. When you do that, you would realize your life isn’t that bad after all. Each one of us has our own set of problems and when we are worried, we often focus on our negatives and their positives. To overcome this, try to view the entire scenery instead of a single part. This would solve the problem of feeling bad about yourself. But it still won’t help you grow. Once you accepted yourself as what you are and come to terms with what the reality holds for you, you can start working on your goals based on what ignites your soul.
- When you feel worried about not being able to focus on your goals, you might want to slow everything down a bit. In most of the cases, when we drive too fast without any breaks, we forget to enjoy the journey and chances of the car crashing down is way too high. The same goes for life. When you have a dream, try to take it slow. Someone might have a Lamborgini and someone might have a very basic Suzuki. Their speeds can’t be matched. Let people pursue their destination at their pace and you would do the same. Moreover, it’s important to focus on the journey more than the destination. And try to cover small distances rather than jumping at it in one go. When we go on to pursue big goals, we often get started way too fast, get bored in the middle and lost by the end. The best way to correct this is by having multiple small goals. Focus on small goals and once and celebrate when you reach there. When you are completely refreshed, go for the another one. It’s always important to remember that it’s not a race but a journey where you need to enjoy than to rush. When you work at it with proper planning and management, chances of it being successful is much higher.
These are some of the things I noticed but the list can be as long as you want it to be. The crust of the question “What the fuck am I doing with my life?” can be found when you try to focus on “your life” rather than theirs.